“after changes upon changes we are more or less the same.”
i have been dwelling on how true those words are.
it has been quite a while since i have updated this blog. i apologize. this here update will be brief. in fact, it will
be more of a down-date, i should think. it’s hard to look forward right now, so i’d rather look backwards.
i found a music page i posted when i was 15 years old. i updated it when i turned 16, and then forgot the password. so, it lingers on as a digital time-capsule.
www.purevolume.com/shanepalkovitz
the songs that i posted on that page ring true today as well, although i would like to think that i could phrase those feelings more eloquently by now.
you should go to that link and listen to “hopes of life lately,” which i actually retitled “lately electric,” but that was in the postpassword times, so i couldn’t update it. i recorded that song upstairs, just singing to that tiny little dot that was a low-quality microphone in the old eMac.
the second song, “why so downcast?” is a live recording from a video camera. i performed it the day i wrote it, and it was not finished (cause is anything ever finished?), and Justin Weber played the djembe with me, having never heard it before.
and, in the vein of things remaining the same, i still sing all the time and i can’t stop writing. here is a video that Kwali and i made recently out in Peacedale Preserve. the aim of the video was to be relaxing and natural, but you should have seen me, walking out there with camera equipment, microphones, headphones and whatnot, trying to balance it all and walk and sing and all that business.
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There always seems to be a tricky spot (future, past, present…)that, emotionally, at least, we like to avoid. I’m sorry it’s feeling hard to look forward right now, Shane. But your backwards is a beautiful place, which makes me believe that your forwards will be, too. I actually have no doubt about this.
And, yes, the video that you and Kwali made=awesome.
Looking back at my old recordings always amazes me at how much I have learned yet not really changed. I thinks our brains are hardwired this way. We are just computers with memories in our harddrives that sometimes get erased or lost, but our processors stay the same, dealing with repeated struggles and endless computations.
Shane, this is a beautiful song…let it play…you have a special sensitive heart…I’m sorry this is a tough time in your life, but know that He will see you thorugh, because, I’m convinced that, the best is yet to come for you, my young friend.
I love this song. It definitely makes me homesick though.
Thank you all for the kind comments!